Friendship

I've been thinking about this alot lately.  What is a friend? 

"A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future, and accepts you just the way you are".

To me a friend is someone that no matter where they are in the world when your world is crashing down they're the first to be there to back you up, stand by you and comfort you - and for me alot of the time that's either over the phone or via the Internet.  I'm grateful for the amazing friends I've made over the years and even within these past few months.  I remember being in high school and I had TONS of friends and some days I think I miss that - the laughs, the adventures, the fun.  But looking back now - 95% of them weren't real friends.  Because where are they now?  Yeah they live in my facebook now and check in when it's convenient for them, when they see a status and they're curious about it - they check in. Those aren't real friends - they're acquaintances. 

Besides for my husband - I have TWO amazing friends from home.  TWO that I still keep in touch with day in and day out.  TWO that will always hold a special place in my heart, even after all these years.

I grew up on Buchanan Avenue in Sayreville New Jersey - and the day I moved in a little girl came riding down the street on her lavender and white bike and confronted my mom - "Excuse me, do you have any kids?!"  I'll never forget that day, because it's the day I met my best friend Janet.  We've been friends for almost 18 years now.  No matter where we've gone, or what roads we've taken - somehow we always end up back on that same road - TOGETHER.  She's seen me through some really tough shit, she's held my hair on nights I was throwing up from being drunk in the woods and we had to hide from my mom, she's laughed with me until we've literally peed our pants and she's been the most amazing friend I've ever had.  We have different lives now - but that doesn't change US.  Now, that's a real friend. 

Sophomore year of High School - Biology class.  I met Jen.  The girl who somehow needed the entire lab table as her desk with all her books - she never had enough space!  She also became one of my best friends that day.  It's been almost 11 years since that day and we still sit on the phone for hours upon hours, day after day and just bullshit about our lives, our days.  Hell, we even plan our dinners together.   Even though I live far away now, that hasn't stopped us from being "attached at the hip".  Friends stick together no matter what, and I think Jen and I are the true definition of that.

"Even though we've changed and we're all finding our own place in the world, we all know that when the tears fall or the smile spreads across our face, we'll come to each other because no matter where this crazy world takes us, nothing will ever change so much to the point where we're not all still friends"

Now, Army life isn't easy.  It takes you away from your life, your home, your norm.  It leaves you stranded somewhere new - ALONE.  Yes you have your husband or your kids but it leaves you with no friends and starting fresh.  But somehow, Army wives do it.  I've learned these past, almost 2 years now - that army wives are a different breed of people.  I never thought I could ever know anyone who could be so outgoing and friendly and supportive of one another - but we have to be.  And that's who we are.  You make friends who come and go but somehow stay in touch through it all and manage to support eachother just through a computer!  I've met some of the most amazing, lifelong friends on the internet.  Yes, my internet friends.  Army Wife Chat and Military Issued Love has been a lifesaver for me.  If I didn't have those girls, I'm not sure how I would of ended up.  A few I've met in real life, most I probably will never meet but I've gotten more support from them when shit has hit the fan than I've gotten from my own family.  We are a family, we've become one.  From deployments, to safe returns, to (unfortunately) husbands killed in action or wounded in action, to the birth of our babies, to weddings and funerals - we're there through it all.  Through a computer.  I remember when I gave birth to Joseph - the first place I wanted my baby's picture sent - was the board!  Because I KNEW my girls were waiting anxiously for it.  I KNEW they've been stalking that site just waiting for his picture and birth story to appear.  Those are real friends - friends who are ALWAYS there.  People laugh, how can you say you really know someone you just talk to on the internet!  HA!  I know half of these girls better than I know some people from back home (that I've known for years).  They're a huge part of my life and I'm forever grateful for their friendship.

Friendship comes in all shape and sizes and don't ever take one for granted.  Because a friend will always get you through - a friend never leaves you alone (even when you feel like there's no hope - a friend always comes along and pull you out of that deep dark hole). My friends are one of a kind - that's for damn sure.

"A friend is a hand that is always holding yours, no matter how close or apart you may be.   A friend is someone who is always there and will always, always care.  A friend is a feeling of forever in your heart"